A December Birth Story

Brant woke me up this morning to go HELP AT A BIRTH of a tribal lady.... Max’s wife had been in labor for two days and still hadn’t delivered.  Max’s wife.... I think she was the biggest pregnant lady I had ever seen. April and Jenny and I had joked for WEEKS that she was way, way over due. We thought she was having twins - or triplets, seriously she was that big. And now her husband had come to get us for help. Let's get this straight right now... I am a linguist, not a midwife. My baby birthing experience is limited to my own 3 boys and watching "Call the Midwife" reruns while Brant was building our tribal house.... Anyways, barely awake, I am throwing gloves and disinfectant wipes and my “Where There Is No Doctor” book in a bag with crackers and rehydration drinks. Praying a ton. I met April and Jenny and we prayed and cried and ran down to the hut on the edge of the village, shoving food in our mouths as we ran. As we climbed up the ladder and into the dark room, there lying on a mat of banana leaves was a huge, perfect, dripping wet, baby girl. The lady had JUST delivered the baby. We were totally shocked but thankful that the baby was crying and alert and the mother seemed to be doing well too. There was blood everywhere; the mother was sitting on clean looking banana leaves in a corner of their hut…. dogs were wandering around. Ladies from the village sat around and ate and watched all the goings on. Little kids wandered around kinda like the dogs… at will, in the way, looking for food and whining. The husband literally paced up and down outside the door; at one point he opened the door and shoved in a bunch of fresh banana leaves - we didn’t understand all that was said but it was something to the effect of “I thought you might need these?” “No, take them away! Close the door!” It was so classic new dad, helpless to do anything, that Jenny and April and I almost burst out laughing. Almost.

Back to the baby on the floor - they just left her on the floor! They didn’t do anything! It certainly wasn’t cold outside, so she wasn’t about to freeze and didn’t need a blanket, but it was just kinda weird to see a brand new baby, laying on her placenta, all by herself with no one fussing over her. As soon as April and Jenny and I realized things were going okay, we sat back and became observers…. just watching to see how the tribal ladies “did” childbirth. They helped the mom “bathe” - got her stripped down and dumped a bunch of water on her with a little bit of soap. They got her into clean clothes and threw away the dirty banana leaves. They got her situated by the fire closer to the center of the hut…. all the while the baby just laid their by herself. 

Then they went back for the baby - sprinkled drops of water on her and used a bit of soap and started trying to clean her up a bit. The placenta and mess they just shoved between the slats in the floor… the dogs ran outside for breakfast. They wrapped the baby in a dirty blanket (I cringed) and then handed her to a nearby teenage girl who held the baby - if you can even use the word held - on her lap. No cuddling, no cooing over her. Just literally held the baby like my boys hold a stack of groceries “When can I put this down?” We were quite concerned that they would literally abandon the baby, but after what seemed like forever, the mother called for the baby and they brought her over and the mom held her - really held her - and looked at her and smiled. She tried to nurse the baby and just watched the baby and you could see the satisfaction of a hard labor rewarded with a healthy, beautiful baby. 

As for the twin…. we were quite concerned that baby #2 was coming soon, so I felt the mom’s stomach and April listened for a heartbeat. Something didn’t seem quite right with her stomach (it was way too hard and taut to have only one baby) but she never did go into labor again and seemed to settle down from labor like there was only one baby. So maybe the ladies here just get really big during pregnancy? We don’t know.

Within two hours I was back at home, thankful for a happy ending and a little overwhelmed at the whirlwind early morning. I joined Brant and the boys for breakfast and told them the story of the baby lying on the banana leaves and the mom by the fire and wrapping the baby in a scrap of dirty cloth...

“...just like Baby Jesus” Caleb said. 

Yes. Yes, as I thought about it, a bit shocked by the realization.... Christ came into the world much the same way. Animals wandering around. Clean hay instead of a sterile bassinet to lay in. A tired mom resting by the fire in a dark room while dad tries his best to help. No running water to wash with. No electricity to illuminate the birth of the Light of the World. No doctor to check that everything was fine and germ free. And yet, Mary delivered a perfectly healthy, Perfect Son. The cloth she had to wrap him in would have probably made me cringe.... yet that was God’s plan for His Son and my redemption. It blows my mind.

We live in the this tribe, but we live so differently than the tribal people - water filter, solar panels, flushing toilet. Sometimes I wonder if they will ever be able to listen and hear the Message we have to teach them - our lives are so different. But I am comforted and reminded again, that the God we have to tell them about came into the world the same way they did - simply, without fuss or modern amenities... welcomed by a mom and dad and the animals and the smell of smoke. 

Thoughts 3 months In...

We have been in the tribe 3 months. I consider it a milestone.... not only because I now have all my pictures hanging on the walls and a light in my dining room, but because I have survived 3 months living in an environment which has a reputation for eating people up. I have a friend who moved into a tribe after living 4 years in town, her husband previously serving as their area’s supply buyer; and after 3 months of tribal living, they carried her out on a stretcher.... the stress and pressure had so gotten to her that she was no longer able to walk and her hair had fallen out to the point that she was almost completely bald. 

So I have survived 3 months and still have my huge mop of hair that is sweaty and sticking to my neck as I write. :) 

Don’t get the idea that I am tough. I still scream at spiders and some days I am overwhelmed by the sheer amount of physical work it takes just to exist here. Each day, each minute is God’s grace... all God’s grace. We have seen His grace so much in these past months. I see it in the sunsets each evening and in the cool breezes that blow through our screens. I see it every time I see a chubby, healthy dark skinned baby - all evidences God is here in this place and taking care of these people who do not yet know Him... and taking care of us as we sweat and swat bugs and stumble to train our tongues to speak this language. 

Today Brant killed a Death Adder not 3 feet away from where Elijah and his friend were playing on the airstrip. As Brant was burying the dead snake and putting away the machete, and still shaking from the adrenaline, he commented, “We would not be here one day without God’s protection and grace.” Yes, it’s true. But it’s also true that we would not live one day without God’s protection and grace in America as well. True, there are hospital ER’s with anti-venom readily available, but there are still car wrecks and cancer and tragic accidents everyday there. Whether here in the swamps where we have buried two members of our little community in less than 3 months, or in America, where our family dentist drops dead from a sudden stroke, life is fragile and precious.... and only God’s grace and protection holds up our loved ones. 

I have not been in America for a couple years now, so I can’t say for certain, but I think that sometimes the comforts and conveniences (and knowledge that there are good hospitals nearby!) make people forget that it is God who protects life and provides the strength to get through it. One thing I love about this life is that it is hard, but through the constant challenges we have so many opportunities to see God work in amazing ways. He gives us strength to face each day with the spiders and the never ending list of chores and the mind boggling language. He reminded us today through a snake in the grass that He is watching and protecting us - and our children - each step of the way. 

Still alive

Hello from the swamps. I am alive.

The last few months have been a whirlwind... as has much of this year. Little by little, I plan to catch up on blogging it all - just to have a record of these crazy days. 

Truth be told, I have written a few posts.... but with the holidays and the World Cup and national elections all summer (and a visiting "healer" from America") all the band-width in town was bought up and we were without Internet much of the summer. 

And the cable company hasn't set up shop here in the tribe yet.... we are probably the last place on earth to ever get cable, or Internet, or electricity or running water for that matter. :)

Pics from our life lately....

Playing in the mud during a rain storm. I let them do this once. Once. They had a BLAST, but after a week of trying to get their clothes clean, the rule is now "You can play in the rain, but not the mud!" 

Instant "fun" night - eating dinner on the floor. Why does everything taste better at a picnic?

 This has been one of my personal huge stressors.... trying to figure out what to do with all the produce people bring me. I got all of the above in the span of 2 days.... the bananas are a win; the boys love the sugar cane, despite the pain of peeling and cutting them (long fat sticks on the far right) and the cucumbers (bright orange in the middle of the pile) are surprisingly sweet and yum. But the palm pit pasty stuff (the stuff that looks like rocks in the bottom left, and also wrapped in the leaves) ....really could have done without. I feel horribly guilty throwing it away, knowing it's a full meal for some tribal person, but the stuff is nasty beyond belief and I don't have the time or energy to figure out how to cook it to make it palatable. 

Brant built MY desk area (our clothes shelves are in the far right) I am beyond thrilled. I love it. I feel like in college - having my own desk that no one messes with and I can decorate however I want to. :) 

 We now have a double digits boy. Celebrated with a team trip to the river to swim. 

The family hike from..... well, let's just say we got 200 yards from the house before we realized Ezra was in his flip flops and that mud in the bottom of the photo is very unforgiving of weak footwear. The trail was so muddy and dense, we gave up about 10 minutes in and came home with cuts, scrapes and leeches. (And Brant carried Ezra the whole way back.) 

The first day

And it was morning and evening... the first day.

Today we moved into the tribe. We have been planning and praying and working towards this day for more years than I can count. And today, August, 18, 2014, was the day the Lord chose. 

It was a hard day and a good day. And we survived it. :)

Getting off the ground this morning was hard. I had been up in the night with Caleb, who was screaming his feet hurt and he needed to throw up... which translated meant he was nervous and sick. So not a great night’s sleep and when the alarm went off at 5, it was a tad too early for my liking. We were supposed to be at the airport by 7, but trying to pack all the toothbrushes and pajamas and freezer food by myself while making breakfast and dealing with a sick little boy and two groggy ones, and it was 7:30 before we arrived at the airport... for our 8 am departure. I was totally frazzled. When I saw the plane fully loaded - with our teammates’ stuff - ours was still in the storage bins at the hanger - I almost started to cry. The pilot though, bless his heart, was so calm and had the plane unloaded and reloaded and me and my cranky boys onto the plane and in the air by 8 am. 

The flight was pretty uneventful until the end when we started to descend and Ezra (who has also been kinda sick-ish the past couple days) started to scream. His ears were hurting. And the pilot, again, bless his heart, headed back up into the sky and circled around and tried the descent again more gradually to ease the pain for poor Ez. There should be a medal in heaven for pilots who fly single moms and kids anywhere. :) 

We landed in the tribe about 9:30 and were greeted by Brant and all the village people swarming everywhere. SO good to see Brant. The boys were thru the roof excited to see our house and had a million questions and wanted to be in a million different places at once. We took a walk down to the river and through the village to try to dissipate the crowd.... literally on our front porch it was standing room only - 30 people packed onto a little 10x10 spot. It worked; by the time we were ready to go in the front door, very few people were hanging around. 

The house.... was part construction zone (ladders and saw dust and wire bits everywhere); part bachelor pad (no hand towel at the kitchen sink to dry your hands... only an old t-shirt); part regular moving chaos of boxes everywhere (where did I put that knife? where is....?) and part rustic camping lodge (screen and boards and bugs). Literally all I could do was laugh..... there is SO much work to do to get it to be a livable home. But I love it. It’s very bright and open and airy. After months of staring at drawings and floor plans, it was fun to see the reality of our plans.  

The view when I first walked in. 

The kitchen is almost completely finished and ready for me to move in.... we just need to hook up the stove to the propane (right now just using a single burner camp stove) and move all Brant’s tools and building things off my counters! The bathroom has a functioning toilet and a semi-working shower, but the water is not hooked up to the bathroom sink yet, and the septic system (and shower!) definitely need some work. There isn’t a door on the bathroom yet, or any place to hang towels, and one whole wall is full of building scraps and pipes, so a lot still to do in there. The boys’ bedrooms are storage for our teammates’ building supplies (neither of our teammates have finished roofs yet) so it will be at least a week or two before the boys can move into their rooms. We need shelves built to put stuff and beds built, but our dining room table and chairs and barstools are all set up and so we have a place to eat and sit. 

So as the boys explored we started to work. I swept and swept and swept. PILES of stuff everywhere - bent nails, wood chips, pipe shavings, trash. Brant pointed out he was too busy building the house to clean it. :) All day I swept and organized and unpacked and swept some more. We gave the little boys their “welcome to the tribe present” which were imitation leatherman multi-tools we got as a grocery store promotion this spring. They LOVED them. They immediately set to work cutting open boxes. Elijah used his little screw driver and fastened all the handles to my kitchen cabinets (the holes had been pre-drilled). Ezra cut his hand with his knife. Elijah cut his hand with his knife. Caleb found a spare mattress and fell asleep. Brant set up my fridge and worked on the back porch getting the washer set up and doing projects. 

I was so thankful for God’s grace and gentleness - it was breezy and slightly overcast most of the day..... warm, but definitely do-able. Everyone had a good attitude and we got a lot done starting to get things set up. By 3 in the afternoon, the breeze had stopped and the heat was intense. Caleb and I sat on the front porch and just watched people. He was feeling pretty miserable. Ezra fell asleep, overwhelmed and feeling slightly miserable himself.  

I played frisbee with a couple tribal ladies and Elijah ran around outside for a while. We got the boys’ beds set up - they are sleeping in the living room (our couch hasn’t been shipped in yet!) and so their mattresses and mosquito nets are all lined up neatly. We got a shelf set up for their clothes and library books. I cleaned up the bachelor kitchen and worked on dinner - SO thankful for all the food prep I had done weeks before - dinner was a snap (pesto, with tortillini and canned chicken, both gifts from our work team who came in May.)

We did hit a snag with the shower... It’s a pre-fab insert thing that Brant had hooked up but had not used yet. We went to turn it on this evening to shower the boys and the pipes leaked everywhere (in the wall!) So we ended up doing a bucket/dipper shower system, which worked fine. We are also missing some hardware pieces to fasten the doors on, so we kinda have to be careful (no shower curtain or doors - just the shower floor and back walls.) But the water was cool and refreshing and we got clean, so that was the most important thing. :) 

After baths and while we were eating dinner, a tribal guy came to the door saying an old woman in the village had died. Very sobering. So now, Brant is out with the people and trying to see what all is going on. 

So tonight, I am totally exhausted and have a headache, but thankful for God’s grace today. I could tell a million people were praying. We have a LOOOOONG way to go to get the house set up and running, but it’s do-able for now and we are clean and fed and have beds and pillows for the night. 

 Our first day in the tribe

Seven Years

Today, seven years ago, we stepped off a plane (Malaysian Airlines, if you can believe it!) and into a new country.... a new life. We had no idea what we were getting ourselves into but we were committed to follow the Lord where He led and this is where He led...

I told someone today that I’d never thought we’d make it seven years. That’s a lie. We fully intended to stick to this path the Lord had put us on. What I meant to say was I never thought I would have lived this life that I’ve lived this past seven years. We knew coming over here that living here would kick out butts. It has. We had no clue what we were getting ourselves into. We just knew the Lord said “Go” and so packed our life up in America and grabbed our (then!) two baby boys and we went. 

They never told us in our missionary training... how hard it would be. Maybe they did; maybe I just didn’t believe them. It has been the hardest thing we have ever done.

In the past seven years, I have learned to make yogurt from scratch. And bread. And refried beans and a whole host of other things that come in a can in America. I can turn whole coconuts and leaves and roots into the most amazing beef curry dish you have ever eaten. I have learned to use a voltage regulator and a generator and dose medicines and read malaria tests. I can explain water filtration systems and solar electric systems and wash laundry by hand. I stock up on food so we can stay put when there’s the occasional riot in town and I can present the Gospel in another language. I have fought ants and roaches and rats and geckos..... because every bug story you have every heard about the mission field is true. 

In the past seven years, I have been misdiagnosed with a heart defect, miscarried a child, broken 4 toes and suffered a horrible mosquito borne disease that I still feel the effects from 5 years later. I have watched my children suffer from diseases I never even knew existed before we came here. I have seen people cheat and steal from us even as we tried to help them. I have seen fellow missionaries buried in this soil. I have cried more tears than I ever did in America.

And yet.... and yet.... In the past seven years, I have seen God do amazing miracles. I have seen Him provide hot fresh, french bread to my door even as I cried over a Subway sandwich advertisement in an American magazine. I have seen Him heal my sick little boys despite the lack of a good American hospital nearby. I have sang “You give and take away but blessed be Your name” and I have experienced the incredible power of worshipping God in loss. I have seen Him give grace and be so gentle in each hardship and trial. I have seen His character revealed in a deeper, more powerful ways. He has given us deep friendships and meaningful work and the profound satisfaction of being used by Him to make a small difference in this little corner of the world. 

We are standing on the brink of a new phase of ministry. One that I am afraid will be the hardest yet. I am scared. So I am thankful for these past seven years; they have been good lessons of God’s faithfulness and power.... lessons I am going to need to remind myself of in the coming days. I have no clue what these next seven years hold. But I know God will be faithful through them and I am thankful.

Leaving LAX for the first time with our little boys

Malaria, Moving and Mayham

It's been a month. Seems like we've had a lot of them lately. Tonight I am reminding myself of God's faithfulness and steadfastness at a time when our life is particularly topsy-turvy and difficult.

We hosted a short term team from our church in San Diego for the month of May. Fun days. Tons of hard work (on all our parts!) and lots of progress on our little jungle house....

This is what our house looked like when the team got into the tribe... (The tarps are their make-shift tent dwelling that all 7 guys slept in.)

This is our house after 17 days.... the dear woman who took the "after" pics had accidentally set the camera setting to "antique" so I don't have a single real color picture of our house! :) 

Basically, all we lack is a roof... and plumbing (rain water collection off the roof and a simple septic system) and electricity (solar panels mounted on the roof to power our fridge, computers and all important fans)

Two days after Brant got out of the tribe, he became violently ill. Like never been so ill before in his life. We suspected Dengue Fever, and were relieved to find out a day later that he "just" had malaria. (Word on tropical diseases.... malaria is the one you want to get out of all the awful options. It's easy to test for and easy to treat - give the right drugs and you're feeling better within 24 hours.)

Trouble was, Brant did not get better within 24 hours. Days into the drug treatment, he continued to deteriorate. We had blood drawn daily and the dear Western nurses here poured over his numbers and tried to figure out why he wasn't getting better. We packed for a trip to the "good" hospital in the big city; his blood work there (and his skin color!) showed declining liver function. He started peeing blood. It was really, really bad. We prayed and prayed and prayed and prepped for a trip out of country. 

As a last ditch effort our American doctor here recommended switching his malaria meds; one theory was that he wasn't responding to the malaria meds and the malaria was attacking his liver. (The other theories involved lots of scary things all involving us packing and moving back to America.) And we are praising the Lord the new malaria medicine worked! Improvement was dramatic - within two days he was on the road to recovery. I literally cried the first time we got his blood work back and his platelet levels had inched upward instead of downward. 

Anyways, suffice it to say, Brant has a long way to go before he can get back to 100%. He can pretty much function like normal in the mornings but he's very easily tired and he sleeps almost every afternoon. His blood numbers are definitely not "normal" yet and he has quite a bit of weight to gain back, but he's getting there and we are encouraged. So work on the tribal house has been put on hold a couple more weeks.

In the midst of all of this, last Friday afternoon I got a call from a neighbor who said there was a fire down the road and perhaps my house helper's neighborhood was on fire? I could see smoke coming from the direction of my house helper's neighborhood, so I asked Brant (who was newly in the "able to walk" stage of recovery) to drive down the road a bit and check things out.... maybe our house helper would need to go home early from work? He left and returned all of 30 seconds later - tearing into the yard, yelling. A missionary's home down the road was up in flames.... Brant gathered all the men at the guest house and all the giant fire extinguishers stashed throughout the guest house and ran out to fight the fire.  

The scene was horrific. I got a call to take water to all the men working on the house, so I saw firsthand. Flames and smoke and falling roof.... and Brant, still sick, was in the middle of it all. The wooden house, occupied by a MAF pilot and his wife and 2 preteens, had literally exploded when their generator overheated. The wife and kids were able to get out the back door with nothing but the clothes on their backs (not even shoes!) Men rushed to cut the roof line - the house was closely connected with another building - a guest house run by another mission. Brant and the men from our guest house tried to use the fire extinguishers to save the wall connecting the two buildings and keep the fire from spreading. But it was useless. Within 2 hours, it was over. Both buildings completely burned to the ground.... there was nothing they could do to stop it. No water. No fire hydrants. No big fancy fire trucks. Nothing.

The hard part was the house that burned was OUR house.... NOT the one we currently were living in, but the one we had lived in right before our last furlough. The beautiful house with the view of the lake and ten million pineapple plants in the yard. We took the boys to see the ruins, still smoldering, and they could pick out their bedrooms. 

That was last Friday. Saturday morning, we had 50 people in our home to help us pack and move. It was total chaos. Sick Brant or no, we had to move. Fire or no, we had to move. The new family was coming in to take over the guest house ministry and we were being kicked out. And so move we did. People organized toys and washed dishes and carefully packed picture frames and candles and in less than 3 hours, our house was totally packed and cleared out - stuff stored for transport into the tribe or for storage here in town. Really, I have no idea where things are and what is in each box.... I'm trying not to stress it too much. :) 

We have moved up to the international school campus and are currently living in a vacant teacher's apartment.... which, yes, does mean we will need to move before school starts in August. :) It is a beautiful apartment and quiet and peaceful up on a hill overlooking the town. The boys think they have hit the jack-pot... our new "house" is close to the playground and gym and library. :) Small detail is that the apartment is only ONE bedroom! The boys are in the bedroom and Brant and I are camping out in the living room, but it's not as bad as it sounds - it has a really big living/dining/kitchen space so it's definitely doable.

And so yes, we are very, very tired. It has been a hard few weeks. There have been many moments of feeling at the end of my rope and lots of sleepless nights and tears. Lots of grace though too. This past week we walked to the library and went to the theater to see "How to Train Your Dragon 2" and baked fresh bread and swam in the pool. Next week we're hoping for a beach trip and a date night and lots of books and sidewalk chalk and more fresh bread. :) (I'm playing with the new bread machine!) :) We are finished with the guest house ministry, so our only goals right now are to get Brant better and move into the tribe and finish taxes. :P

I know that time will bring perspective and thankfulness for God's gentleness during these days. God is always so gentle with me. Right now, though, I am just thankful that the past few weeks are over and we survived. :) 

Totally not related, but I love the peacefulness of this picture taken on the river bank in our tribe.

Peace in the craziness (aka not thinking about packing)

We are in house building mode. I have scraps of paper with kitchen cabinets sketched out and window dimensions scribbled on napkins. I would say it's kinda fun - like designing and building your dream house, except I am pretty sure my dream house would never be in a swamp with a hive of angry bees underneath the floorboards. I wake up in the night calculating how many kilos all the boys' toys weigh and how many flights it will take to get all our stuff moved into the jungle.

We are going through lots of Tylenol and Advil around here. :) 

I was looking up a picture on the computer for someone earlier today and all my "Last Import" pictures caught my eye.... I was shocked at all the fun stuff we've done the last few weeks..... So to forget the tribal house drama for a few moments, I want to remember and be thankful that even though it doesn't feel like it, we have had some peace and fun in the midst of the craziness...

Exploring a new beach... friends with a canoe.... what else could you ask for?

 Marshmallow Peeps from a package.... Microwave at the Guest house... need I say more?

Track & Field Day at the international school... Elijah woke up at 5, he was SO excited! Alas, my sweet firstborn has inherited his parents' non-athletic abilities, but he was thrilled with his 2 3rd place ribbons (only 3 people competing!) and his prized 2nd place (in shot put!) and his participation award. :) 

This is a really cool pic... but he only traveled about 3 feet. :) 

The little boys cheered Elijah on and had fun getting face painting... which to be "cool" (and avoid getting paint on your face!) is in the form of an arm tattoo. :) 

  

Brant was in the village for Track & Field Day, but we celebrated a fun day anyways with friends at the pizza restaurant. Elijah's not mad... he's just too cool to smile for pictures these days. 

We found canned pears at the grocery store... so of course we had to make the pear mice we saw in the Clubhouse magazine. :) 

Elijah and I had a "date" to the mission community's annual "Classical Concert" - it's a fundraiser for the school and anyone in the community with musical talent can participate. It was such a fun night topped off with "fancy" desserts in the courtyard.

Brant's birthday is the first weekend in May... he shares a birthday with our teammate, Ryan, so we planned the building trip so the guys could be back in town for a nice birthday dinner. Life has been so hectic lately that a guest who stopped by to get a key for her room ended up helping me roll out the pie crust while my house helper frantically peeled and cut apples... but together all 3 of us got a pie made from scratch in less than 45 minutes! The boys and I each got a small slice and then Brant ate the rest of it all by himself. He was a happy man. 

Seven Days

Brant and Ryan were in the tribe seven days for Building Trip #2. Just a quick trip in to get Ryan’s foundation laid before Easter and all the festivities in town began. A far cry from the two week trip planned at the end of April; shorter than the ten days of Building Trip #1. How hard could seven days be?

Very. 

Day #1 - Brant had not been gone two hours... was still in the air, flying, in fact, when I got a phone call. Crying, my friend barely managed to whisper the words “There’s been a plane crash.” One of the old school missionary pilots, been flying here over 20 years, clipped the edge of a bridge in the misty morning as he struggled to get altitude on take-off. The plane exploded in flames... he was killed instantly. 

Day #2 - A flurry of activity - calls from all over the island; people looking for a place to stay for the funeral. Tears. People stopping to visit and hug and talk. I had just talked to his wife the day before the crash. I spend hours talking with the little boys explaining that Daddy is okay; that his plane did not crash. 

Day #3 - The funeral - a 5 hour affair with hundreds of people packing the hanger where he normally parked the now charred plane. Speeches and tears and his favorite music played. Tears.

Day #5 - We had a beautiful day - April and I dragged all 6 kids to the big city to watch “Rio 2” and eat ice cream. :) It was fun and relaxing and a perfect reset after a really hard week. On the way home, April spotted a sign that said “Decorative cut flowers” - not real sure what it could mean, we stopped and there were REAL flowers.... roses and tulips and daisies and Easter lilies. NEVER have seen flowers like that in our almost 7 years here. We screamed in excitement and bought ourselves bouquets. :) 

About two hours after we got home from the movies, boys in bed, flowers arranged in a makeshift vase, I got an email from one of our tribal missionary families. They needed a room at the guest house.... tomorrow. The wife was having some odd pregnancy symptoms and needed to get things checked out. When something like this happens, we (meaning Brant!) immediately we go into med-evac mode, calling flights and the doctor and leadership guys.... all of whom were off island at the moment. I had never done a med-evac myself and I was up late into the night trying to get all the pieces together. 

Day #6 - I did the med-evac for the family with the lady who was having problems with her pregnancy and it was a tiring, stressful day, running them to doctors and kids to baby-sitters (they have 5!) but praising the Lord we got through it and my little boys (who I had to drag all over town with me) did an excellent job and were such troopers! We found out that the baby had died, but the wife had not had any labor symptoms or any signs that she would deliver the baby, so the doctor advised they stay in town til then to make sure everything was okay. It was really sad and a hard day. Lots of tears. 

Anyways, the next night (Day #7 - Brant still not home) I wake up about 3 am to pounding on my outside door.... I thought it was a drunk guy, so I called the family we had med-evaced to get the husband to come check it out (they were the only ones staying at the guest house) and the wife answered the phone, crying and yelling for me to come help. The pounding on the door was a little local girl who had come to help take care of their kids while the wife was ill. Anyways, I get to the guest house (in my PJs - had locked my sleeping boys in our house) and the wife had delivered the baby - a little boy - in the night. The doctor had come and helped (I had slept through the whole thing) and everything had gone smoothly. The doctor had left about 2 hours earlier, but around 3 a.m. the wife started hemorrhaging and passed out. It was so, so scary. We really thought she was going to die. So the husband and I carry the wife down the stairs to the car and he rushes her to the hospital, where mercy of all mercies, there was a doctor in the emergency room (usually they have NO doctors at the hospitals during the nights here!) and the doctor was THE one OB doctor that the American doctor here had recommended. They immediately did a D&C and stabilized her. (I knew none of this til lunch time.) Meanwhile, I am at the guest house - with their 5 kids, this local girl, and my 3 boys back at my house (same property, about 100 yards away.) So the girl and I carry all 3 of my little boys in the rain to the guest house where we put them in a vacant room to sleep (of course they didn't - they all woke up right away) and I tried to sleep for a couple hours til day light... all the while going back and forth with a leadership wife trying to get blood donations sorted (we only use missionaries for blood donors.) Both of our head leadership guys were actually flying while this whole thing happened, so there was no way to get ahold of them! I was so scared and overwhelmed.... after I got my boys settled and their kids settled I lay down in bed and just sweat and sweat and sweat... it must have been all the adrenaline kicking in. Needless to say, I never went back to sleep that night, and my boys didn't either. The family's youngest (2 yrs old) woke up screaming and I tried to comfort him til I realized he still nursed and would not be comforted without mama. So I held a screaming kid for 2 hours solid. If I had ever thought about having kid #4, I no longer will. :) Somehow I got Elijah out the door for school. All 8 kids ate breakfast. I walked around in this "what in the world just happened?” fog and I prayed their mama would live. I cried. I called my dad and we talked and I cried and we prayed. 

As soon as the leadership guys touched down around 8 am, they headed straight up here, took all of the kiddos (mine included!) and sent me home to bed. Brant came home that evening and I just cried and cried and cried. Hard, hard days I've been through lately. By myself. 

I kinda accept life as it comes and don't really question God much... firm believer that what happens He ordains, so I need to just get over it and accept it as good from His hand. But I really, really struggled with this past week. Death, chaos, more death. Why was I by myself for those things? Couldn't the Lord have timed all those things a bit differently? Not even was Brant not around, but neither were our leadership guys. I was all alone. All alone with 8 kids and a screaming baby. Scared. 

In that dark night as I lay sweating, I flipped to Hosea. Funny assignment the Lord gave Hosea - go marry a prostitute. I am sure he wasn't thrilled with his job and had a lot of questions for the Lord too. But he did it and God gave grace and God used that really hard assignment to spread His message of grace to His people.

And really, God gave grace to me too. He gives such grace. I had my beautiful Easter flowers. Little boys who thought they were on a grand adventure getting to have a sleep over at the guest house.  No fancy meal or dessert to welcome Brant home, but we got yummy fried yellow rice as take-out and we all love yellow rice. All grace. And a husband and good night’s sleep and a new day. 

Not Quite World Records

March.... will go down in the record books in our house....

First trip into the tribe as a family.... (already wrote about that one!) 

First time we ate blueberries and strawberries in the same YEAR here....

After a really fun girls' grocery shopping trip to the big city with my teammate (yes, life is that exciting here) I ended up with FRESH strawberries AND blueberries AND cream... all in the same day. I wanted to make a Flag Cake :) but ended up settling on berry shortcake for dessert... and breakfast... and lunch... :) It was heaven. 

First broken bone playing sports for me.... (soccer injury - snapped my big toe all the way across the joint... yes, 3 weeks later, still painful)

And then... and then.... and then, as if the excitement of fresh berries and tribal visits and broken toes was not enough....

My darling Ezra decided to try to jump over the tent fort in one great flying leap... and landed on his shoulder with lots of screaming and tears. I was a good, compassionate mother and rocked him for about one minute and then said "Shake it off." Five days later, when he was still refusing to use his arm, even with us yelling at him and threatening to spank him, we decided maybe he was still really hurt. Yes, I am quick sometimes.

So when Brant called from the hospital radiology department saying "His collarbone is definitely broken," I cried I felt so guilty. I made an appointment to have his shoulder braced later that afternoon with our American doctor here in town.

First broken bone for Ezra....

But poor kid, never got a second glance from the doctor. About 10 minutes before we left our house for his doctor's appointment, we got a call from Elijah's teacher... he has a fever - of 104 - and is really sick. Could we come get him?

As the school and the clinic are on the same property, I headed right up, dropping Caleb with our teammates. Brant was prepping his flight into the tribe and couldn't get away from the airport. I dropped Ezra in the clinic waiting room and ran to Elijah's class where he was laying on the floor asleep with a pillow and a blanket. Have you ever seen your kid asleep on a classroom floor? Gives you horrible mother guilt... almost as bad as threatening to spank your kid for not using a broken bone. :)

I carried Elijah to the clinic, where his fever registered 105 and he began throwing up uncontrollably. It was horrific to watch. The nurses and doctor totally ignored Ezra and immediately started working on Elijah.

So tests and more high fevers and lots more throwing up and a hospital trip later and Elijah is diagnosed with Typhoid.... a very dangerous bacterial infection of the intestines. You get it from contaminated drinking water or food.... like in a tribe where no one has clean water. We had all been vaccinated against it, but the vaccine isn't 100% effective. I had never had any experience with Typhoid, but the "Where There is No Doctor" book says "Of all the tropical fevers one can get, Typhoid Fever is the worst." And they were right on....

First Typhoid Fever case in our family (and hopefully the last!)....

For those who care, Typhoid basically destroys your white blood cells so your body can't fight infection. They put Eiljah on very strong antibiotics, but because his WBC was so low, it took a long time for the drugs to even kick in and for us to even see a bit of improvement... like 5-6 days. We had to give him meds every 2 hours around the clock for several days to keep his fever down and to keep him from throwing up (yes, even through the night.)

So to say we've been reeling a bit the last few weeks is an understatement. Brant left for the tribe just 3 days into the broken collar bone/Typhoid fever saga and I was totally exhausted. But with tons of people praying, and nowhere we had to go (or could go!) we made the best of our forced stay at home....

There were crafts... (aka "Use up all the random supplies we don't want to fly interior)

There were TONS of books and some doughnut making as a result (from Homer Price's "Doughnuts")

And there was lots of quiet time coloring and painting.... I love this picture.

I know these pictures look like we've had a vacation the last week... I didn't take a picture of all the laying around that happened the other 23 hours of each day and the nonstop watching movies and shoving pills into clamped close mouths and the tears (both the boys' and mine!) ....I was trying to dwell on the positive. :) 

Has been a tough few weeks... but by God's grace and with endless prayers and help from friends, we can do tough. As the doctor (who finally got around to seeing Ezra!) said as she prepped Ezra to be a "soldier" with his brace on, "You have to be a tough soldier when you wear this pack." And he's been a tough guy pulling imaginary guns and swords from his "pack" ever since. 

First boy who's become a soldier...

A good tribe for us

On Monday we headed into our tribal area... it worked out with flights and weights that the boys and I were able to go in and get a sneak peek at the area we will be living and serving in very soon....

I would by lying if I didn't say we were all really, really nervous. I was excited about the trip, but what if I hated the area or it was a horrible experience for the boys and then we spent the next 4 months dreading moving into the tribe? We talked and prepped the little boys a ton... they would be the first little white skinned boys the tribal people had ever seen... and I was afraid they would be mobbed.... which would lead to screaming and hating the area and spending the next 4 months dreading.... you get the idea. The night before we left the boys were up off and on all night long; they were so nervous. So we were a BIT tired and groggy heading into the whole adventure... 

BUT, we had a ton of people praying. We could feel it every minute. And God was so gracious in answering prayers.

The flight in... the boys are extremely disappointed that we have an airstrip and don't get to use the helicopter. Our budget is extremely grateful we have an airstrip. :):) 

We're about an hour and a half flight from town. They don't serve food or have potties on little mission planes... just FYI. :)

Our tribe! The airstrip on the right side.... you can faintly see the main village path headed off the path on the far left end of the airstrip. The second path forms a T and heads to the river. Our houses are going to be located towards the end of the airstrip close to the village.

The first hour on the ground was intense. Very intense. As soon as we landed and the plane turned off, people swarmed around the plane. The door opened and I could see dozens of faces... beautiful, beautiful faces. Immediately it was like "These are OUR people!" and I was so overwhelmed. Little grandmas rushed up to me and started giving me hugs and my thought was "They will never live long enough for us to learn the language and present the Gospel" and that was a really sobering thought. I also realized almost instantly that not a single lady spoke a single word of the national language... they didn't even understand "hello." It was this choking, "I HAVE to learn this language right this second" kind of realization. So, with all those emotions, I am fighting back tears while I'm trying to greet everyone, because I don't want to freak them out by being the crying white lady. AND this whole time the boys are clinging to me for dear life and hiding behind me as people are trying to grab their arms and say hello. 

  

But really, the whole introduction part went really well. The people were beautiful - they bathe every day in the river, so they don't have a lot of skin diseases and they don't smell bad. They have very fertile ground, so things grow well and food is not an issue - so they are very healthy... not a lot of runny noses, goupy eyes, or yellow hair from malnutrition. (All common issues we see in tribal areas.) Plus the people were very kind and restrained. They were excited to see us and they wanted to grab arms - how they give traditional greetings - but they didn't pull on the boys' clothes or hair or cheeks. They seemed to get that the boys were scared, so they kept some space, which was such a blessing.  And the boys held it together well - no crying or screaming; they were very brave. Immediately the ladies started trying to teach me words - pointing to boys/girls, house, bridge.... lots of laughter as I tried out very unfamiliar sounds. They showed us around the village - taking us to our lodging for the night and showing us the crude outhouse a prior missionary had constructed. They helped the little boys (and me!) over the logs that serve as bridges around their area. 

All this while Brant was helping unload the plane and get our wood cutting team set up in their lodgings. He had to introduce them to the leaders of the village and get things squared away for the flight the next day. So basically it was just the boys and I and all the village ladies and kids on our own....

I was so thankful for the peoples' kindness and how gentle they were with the boys. The paths in the village are wide and clean, so the boys were soon comfortable running up and down them as we explored. The people grouped around us as we walked around. We pulled out the few toys we had brought with us and that gave the boys a good "coping" mechanism - they could throw a Frisbee with the other kids without any language needed, plus it kept a healthy distance between them. :) The tribal kids were fascinated by the Frisbee and caught on quickly, laughing and running after it. Some of the ladies figured out how to throw it and were giving their kids lessons on holding their arms just so... it was fun to watch. Once the boys saw that they were just regular kids who responded just as they did to a Frisbee, that really helped them relax.

Within a few hours, the boys were playing with the tribal kids, swapping grasshoppers in some made up game I never understood. (Though I think it entailed throwing the grasshoppers into the water and trying to peg them with sticks.)

I am thankful for the prior times we've had in tribal areas.... the boys have learned ways they could "connect" with the tribal kids and "play" even though cultures and language are so different.

Once Brant was able, he took us around the house sites and showed us where our house would be built. We have a huge beautiful fruit tree in our yard that will give us much needed shade in the afternoons. (And that we might get some fruit from!) We were told we didn't "own" the tree or its fruit - it belongs of one of the village leaders, but he was willing to share. Ezra was ecstatic- it was one of his favorite types of fruit.

We slept in the radio shed, which various short term missionaries have used before. It was cozy.... 3 tiny rooms- 1 with a table, 2 with wooden planks for beds which was really uncomfortable. :) No electricity and no water, except what collected off the roof in a 50 gallon drum outside (which we filtered to drink) But we survived.

It is hot in our area. Brant had warned me, and he was right. But, I was pleasantly surprised that it wasn't THAT hot - not Texas in August intense, envelop you and you can't breathe kind of hot, but still hot, probably between 90 and 95 degrees. (In town where we live now, it's usually about 88 in the hottest part of the day.) It was very humid - our skin was sticky almost the whole time we were there. The worst part was it was still, very still. Not a whiff of a breeze at all. But when I fanned myself with a paper, it was so much more bearable. We do have ceiling fans for our house and little personal fans for our beds, so I think it will be doable. It did cool off nicely at night and was comfortable in the morning, so I was excited that we won't be sweating to death our entire time in the tribe. :)  

The people brought us peanuts, boiled bananas (which were nasty) and these amazing fresh green bananas that we gobbled up. Late at night they brought a soup of potatoes and pumpkin... no spices, just boiled potatoes, pumpkin, and water. It was actually really, really good. 

 Heading down the main path of the village....

A typical village house...

 

Headed out to the airstrip to check out our house site...

Elijah standing in front of where our teammate's house will be - gives you an idea how close we will be to the village. (We are a tad farther away.... our house is the farthest from the village.)

My men standing in front of where our future house will be built....

The second day we went down to the river... the banks are steep and about 20 feet below the actual village; the people say it never floods over the banks. The river freaked me out a bit... it is huge, deep and very, very swift moving. Two words: life jackets. :)

Overall, it was a really, really good trip. I was encouraged about some things (tons of fresh fruit and veggies!) and was able to get a head's up on things that could be challenging (lots of flies everywhere - make sure to bring a good fly swatter!) Mostly though, I was excited to meet the people and know that this is where God has us. Thanks for praying. God abundantly answered your (and our!) prayers. As the boys were running around on the airstrip Monday evening, Elijah walked up and said, "Mom, I'm glad we picked this tribe. It will be a good tribe for us" and I agreed. 

The Lego Movie

So how ironic is it that in our little backward, far-flung corner of the world, we were able to see "The Lego Movie" this afternoon in 3D?!?! So much fun. The boys LOVED it.  Still loving the new theater in the big city 2 hours from us.

And yes, we let the boys get popcorn and sodas... not to rub it in, but we paid less for our tickets, sodas and popcorn together than you pay to get a ticket to a matinee.... there are perks, you know, to living in a 3rd world country. :)