On verbs and death in the jungle

In just a few weeks, we will celebrate one year of living in the tribe. This time last year I could not even say “hello” in this language. Last night I lay awake in bed working through verbs and figuring out aspect and telic with clitics and tone and all these really scary linguistic terms. I had a huge break through. I almost started crying with excitement as it all became clear.... tone 3 denotes total punctuality on verbs. So ha! We ARE going to conquer this language!

This morning I cried again. We got word that one of the women in the village died. Young mom... had 3 little kids. She was excellent at helping me with language and always very kind to our whole team. She got a cough a few weeks back - when it was going around the village and all my boys got it. I showed her how to cut lemons to boil and add sugar cane to sweeten the “tea,” but she just got thinner and weaker. And last night she entered eternity without Christ.

My verb “ah-ha” moment came too late for her. Too little, too late. Too little, too late.... echoes again and again in my head this morning as I sweep dust off the floors and wipe dead bugs off the counter tops.

I just finished reading Acts. God makes me mad in the book of Acts. Paul’s life, while exciting at times, was also, in my mind, a classic example of poor use of time. He became a believer and then spent how many years in the desert? He could have been out preaching during those years. When he was imprisoned in Jerusalem and tried before Festus, he appealed to Caesar.... later Festus says Paul could have been released had he not appealed to Caesar. Why did God allow Paul to say those words and be jailed for years because he was now bound to stand trial in Rome? I don’t understand and I don’t like it.

The woman who died last night will spend eternity in hell due to poor timing... we didn’t get here soon enough, learn the language fast enough, couldn’t explain the Gospel in time...

That’s a lie, of course. Just like Paul and King David and countless others in Scripture show us, God’s timing does not always make sense in our minds. Delays and roadblocks and detours.... in my mind, usually all a huge waste of time.... but all planned by God. All controlled by God. All part of God’s plan to bring Himself glory. 

I don’t understand and I don’t like it. But today, through the tears, I am clinging to that truth. God knows. He sees and He is here, working out His plan for my life and these people. One verb at a time.